Went with Ryan to San Gabriel Academy where he delivered one of my favorite of his sermons. I don't remember what he titles it, but in my memory it's titled "Let Mercy Come." It's a look at the music video "What I've Done" by Linkin Park. Let Mercy come and wash away what I've done. I have more thoughts about that, but I really need to get to bed.
This other thing on my mind won't keep until tomorrow...
More than one very beautiful woman has asked me recently why men are intimidated by her. I've hesitated to tell you what I'm thinking, sisters, because I don't know the answer. I would not presume to speak on behalf of all men. I think many men are like me in that I want to know the answer before I speak. To risk an opinion without high probability of being correct is to gamble in favor of looking the fool. I would rather be silent and change the subject to one I can speak of with greater certainty. What's the saying, better to be silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt?
We, the brotherhood, value the safety of the bottomline. Knowing that I am right is important to me. Not only do I want to know I'm right, I want you to know I'm right.
Today in response to one of my sisters with the same and increasingly frequent query, I wrote the sections in italics:
I'll think out loud and some of what I say is just me throwing my thoughts in the ring without premeditation. By the way, that isn't typical or comfortable for men. We would rather work the thing out and then just spit out a bottomline. So to think along with you is vulnerability for us. We are letting you see us before we know the answer. Men want to be respected as much as women want to be loved and adored. We want you to see us as strong and smart and capable. So to even think out loud about an unfinished conclusion is to invite you behind the scenes, into the inner workings of imperfection.
If I tell you how I work, I'm giving you the power to undo me. Samson told this chick the secret of his strength and it cost him, right?
When you ask me "what are you thinking?" I hear you asking if I trust you enough to let you hear my thoughts before I test them, to let you see my mind unpolished. If I trust you, I'll let you in. If I don't trust you enough, my response to your question is "not much, I'm not thinking much."
I wonder if other men do the same thing? Is that just me?
One of the reasons you are intimidating is that you are very quick to the bottomline. If you consistently beat us to the bottomline, our insecurity may interpret this as you showing us that you are more man than we are. How can this tiny little cute thing be more man than I am? What does that say about me? So wait, not only is she beautiful, and sexy, so she's definitely got the woman thing covered, but now she's also out-manning me? What's left for me? I can't out-woman. I can't out-man her. Just have to out-run her.
At the end of every blog I sign off... "Goodnight, Beautiful... Goodnight Strender." I'm telling every woman reading that she is beautiful and every man reading that he is both strong and tender, that he is strong enough to be tender.
I do have an early appointment tomorrow so I need some rest. See you later.
Goodnight, Beautiful...
Goodnight, Strender
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